The Most Underrated Business Strategy – Shamelessly Ambitious Episode 115

Filed in All Episodes, Business Strategy, Collapsing Time, Emotional Intelligence — August 24, 2023

This business strategy often goes unnoticed or misunderstood: emotional regulation.

As a therapist and entrepreneur, I’ve come to realize that emotional regulation is a strategy that not only sustains our business goals, but also ensures our overall well-being. This powerful practice holds the key to maintaining momentum and success.

In a world where we’re bombarded with strategies for creating passive income, building strong branding, and attracting customers, emotional regulation tends to be the underdog in the story of entrepreneurship. Of course, I’m all here for the masculine business strategies, but as a therapist, I’m also here for the fact that none of that works if we don’t work. If we’re not thriving, it’s pretty far-fetched to believe that anything else in our life will be thriving. Emotional regulation, meaning the ability to regulate our emotions and check in with our emotions often is 110% a thriving strategy.

Small Bit of BTS from Empire Society

During a recent conversation within my membership group, the Empire Society, I was prompted with the question: how do I check in with my emotional well-being. It dawned on me that this practice, which is often overlooked, holds immense weight in our success as entrepreneurs.

Now, before we jump into the specifics of my emotional regulation practice, I want to emphasize the importance of integrating it into your routine. This isn’t a one-time lesson; it’s something that requires consistency and awareness. Just like we schedule time for work tasks, setting aside a few moments daily for emotional regulation is vital as well.

My Emotional Regulation Practice 

My emotional regulation practice centers around five simple steps that take only around five to seven minutes to integrate into my day. Sometimes it doesn’t feel necessary to do an emotional regulation check in, but oftentimes it does. So I like to do this practice before I start working for the day. Depending on how the day goes, I may need to do this after working, too. What happens when you’re not practicing emotional regulation tactics, is that you’re almost haphazardly moving in and out of your business. You’re closing the door on the capacity and possibility for flow because you’re mentally and emotionally all over the place. This is because you haven’t taken the time to get out of your head and into your body.

01: Grounding

I start with grounding and this often begins before I even step into my office. As I make my way to my office doors, I like to first step outside and begin by grounding myself. Something as simple as putting my feet on the grass or taking a few moments for breathwork and meditation help me focus on the present and get my mind in a calm space.

02: Self-Check-In

Then, I ask myself, “how do I feel?” When I answer this, I’m careful to use the phrase “I feel” rather than “I am” to avoid adopting emotions as part of my identity. So, rather than saying “I am overwhelmed,” I say, “I feel overwhelmed.” This subtle linguistic shift keeps emotions malleable making it feel more realistic for me to move through them. This is where I go deep. Instead of stopping at the surface level of feeling overwhelmed, I go deep by using a therapeutic tactic called ‘the seven whys’. I’ll start by saying, “I feel anxious,” and continue asking myself why seven times in a row until I come to the root of the emotion.

03: External Expression

Once I’ve figured out the root, I verbalize my emotions. By speaking them out loud, I validate my feelings and create space for them. This acknowledgment is an essential part of the emotional regulation process.

04: Self-Nurturing

I then like to nurture that feeling. We have a tendency as humans to acknowledge an emotion and then instantly move forward, or even worse, shame ourselves for feeling that way. But by taking a nurturing approach, I acknowledge the validity of my emotions and offer myself the support and understanding I’d want from my friend. One of my favorite ways to do this is by actually writing it out like a love letter to myself.

Linked my journals I mention in the podcast here for you. I have the Better Every Day and Zodiac versions.

05: Figuring Out My Needs

Finally, the last step is to ask myself, “what do I need?” Sometimes it’s as simple as consciously anchoring into trust.  

So, that’s my practice. This practice allows me to approach my work with intention and clarity. In all honesty, it allows me to get out of my head so I can show up as my best, most aligned self in all areas of my life, not just business. By addressing my emotions and becoming self-aware, I shift from a chaotic state to a centered and creative state.

Understand that emotional regulation isn’t just about solving negative emotions but also about nurturing positive ones. It’s a way of connecting with ourselves and our businesses on a much deeper level. By opening the door to this type of connection, we can tap into our true potential and create a more sustainable and successful business journey.

If you’re reading this and you don’t already have an emotional regulation strategy in place, I invite you to try mine. Incorporate these five steps into your routine, and experience the positive impact it has on your emotional well-being and business.

If you’re seeking more in-depth guidance on emotional regulation and its integration into your business journey, I encourage you to explore my free podcourse, MOVE. It’s a private podcourse that dives much deeper into these strategies, helping you unlock the power of emotional regulation to achieve success that goes beyond the conventional boundaries.

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I am the definition of duality—I swear like a sailor and break rules like it’s my job, but I also hold incredible space for my clients and work my ass off to help them achieve the success they’re after (but faster).

My background in counseling and my experience founding three multi-6-figure businesses gives me a unique perspective on what it means to show up and serve as an ethical and successful CEO. Leaning on my experiences, along with the experiences of the hundreds of women I’ve been honored to work with, I offer founders a psych-backed and human-first approach to scaling their legacies—both in and out of the office. 

I don’t believe in a one-size-fits-all approach to anything, but especially business. Because at the foundation of any profitable, sustainable, ethically sound business is one thing: humans being humans. And to do anything without first considering the human behind the action (i.e., with intention and vulnerability) is to remove our most powerful predictor of success—ourselves.

Around here, you’ll find a personalized and multidimensional client experience paired with a few tastefully dropped fucks. You’ll also find a new way of being in business that’s sustainable, ethical, and built around your life (not the other way around).

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